The Breakup Coach

The Temptation to Say

Now that your friend's relationship is over, you may feel a tremendous urge to tell her, "I told you so".

Maybe you saw it coming from a mile away.  Maybe you always knew he wasn't right for her. You watched them arguing at every party for the past three months.  Or she cried on your shoulder night after night while they were still together. You may even have told her that the relationship was just no good.

So now that it's finally over, your friend is more upset than ever but you feel like dancing for joy. And you are just itching to finally tell her that you were right all along.  I mean, if she's just listened to you she wouldn't be in this mess right now, would she?  I get it, I really do.  Your frustration may have built over time and it's totally normal to want to let it out.

But before you do that, ask yourself what good it will really do.  Will it make her feel any better?  Will it make you feel any better?

Honestly, at this point you both already know that you were right, but pointing that out is just going to make her feel more "wrong" than she already does.  And once you get past that initial satisfied feeling of being right, you're just going to end up feeling like a bad friend.  And would you rather be "right" or be a good friend?

What's done is done. It's in the past now, so let it go.  Keep it to yourself, and give yourself props for being a really, really good friend (the kind  of friend that doesn't point out stuff that's already obvious to everyone and will just make her feel worse anyway).

Yay you!

The BreakUp Coach

P.S. If you want to help your friend feel better, let her know about my free, personalized email support programs designed to help women get through a breakup in style.

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